so, go for it! it doesn't have to be heavy... it could be humorous... or it could be as heavy as you need it to be.
s said....
growing up, my mom and i were exceptionally close. mostly, i learned very young exactly what would make her happy, and i tried to do just that. i did it for most of my life. even when it went against how i felt as an individual, i sacrificed a lot of that for the love of my mother. i thought by "doing" i could gain her affection. and she showered me with it. it wasn't until i was divorced and looked back on the two people i tried so hard to "please" that i realized this important truth: if i did things for others to gain approval that were contrary to my individual values, then i was comprising myself. and- in the end- it's only me, looking at me, in the mirror, and the love (or hate) i have for myself is the only thing i'll have at the end of my life. no matter how much those around me love or care for me, it's only me when dust returns to dust. so i'm learning how to satisfy myself ( so to speak) first, and not look for that stamp of approval from everyone else. it's hard, hard, hard.
going back to my childhood, again... my mom was very doting, and because i was so good ( or i thought it was because i was so good- she would have loved me no matter what, but for some reason i didn't get that) she always made me feel incredibly special. i was very proud to have such a loving parent, and other kids i knew would comment on the notes i got in my lunchbox, or the special trips she would take me on, etc. they thought she was very cool. as i got older and began having friends over, something weird would happen. my friends would come and want to hang out with my mom, because she was so nice, and fun. and my mom would love the attention so much that she and my friend would end up spending the day together. i would start to pout and feel left out, and that's when she would start teasing me. i don't think she ever meant any harm- but i was already so displaced inside. i was desperate for her attention. i was socially challenged. and so to see (possibly) my only friend, gang up with my mother (only the most important person who walked the earth) in any sort of teasing, would just wreck me. i would find myself upstairs, alone in my room, most likely lying down on my bed, listening to them laughing together downstairs.
for some reason- that was the point that it clicked for me. i told myself then that anybody i ever really loved would leave me. i made myself believe that. i felt no one felt any sense of loyalty or responsibility for my existence.
i'll save the rest for another day....
comment below.
i steal change. i mean, all change. if you leave it out, i'm stealing it.
i always feel fat. and i'm scared of this new class because i dont want people to know me when i'm fat! how bad is that?!
Corporate America sucks balls. I know it's part of our (failing) economy, but OH MY GAWD...I can't stand it. My office is full of cocky, newbie sales guys. They may all be dead by the end of the week.
How rude is it to roll into an office where there are established personel and pretend like you know more than they do? Well I'll TELL you how rude it is...it's IMMENSELY fucking rude. I haven't said anything yet, but there's one guy that's fixin' to get taken down about 17 notches.
Here's the thing...if you're a cocky sales guy and you ADMIT it - then I like you. I can hang=dle you. It's all out in the open, ya know? If you're a cocky sales guy and you CAN'T admit it, and THEN you make FUN of the cocky sales guy who'll ADMIT he's cocky BECAUSE he's cocky, then dude...you're a complete crab-stained scrotumjunkie.
So, yeah, I'm not a fan of a few of the pea-assed hamburgerfarmers that are here in my office in the middle of corporate America, but...corporate America is still paying my bills. I will only complain here. In the meantime, what this rank-fingered assberry doesn't know (b/c he's NEW) is that he will desperately need me to do his job well in the forseeable future. Yeah, good luck with that...